TOUPEE'S AND EARWIGS COMING SOON TO A RECORD CHAIN NEAR JERUSALEM!

hello world of glob! i own your life. this is another multiversal posterity mechanism. do you fuckin posers even listen to r. kelly? did you know that there was a tp2? or did you think it just skipped up? trust me: i'm still alive at the time of this entry. listened to the abc's today. it captured the times pretty alright if you acksed me. so last week i went to old forge, ny. home of enchanted forest / water safari, where the fun never stops. when i got picked up- my chauffeur showed up with half of her busted ass car up on the muggerfucking (rape) lawn and half on the dwiveray. the whole time i was saying things like, i don't really wanna go. i'm just gonna sit at home this weekend and not really do much of anything. cus thats cool shit. but they were all, no, man come on dude, go! what else are you gonna do? well as it turned out i did the same thing there that i would have done here at home. except going there i was almost manslaughtered. check this out. so first, we go for gas. we get the gas. but oh wow the miscues upon leaving that there parking lot. ugly. but thats nothing. so eventually we get to driving. we got about a 55 minute drive. no big deal really. so we're driving for about 20 minutes when the two broads in the front say "oh i gotta pee, and pee is what needs to happen next, and stopping will come first, lets go pee together, and be gay-gay-hate, and comment on the ugly art on the wall of some ice cream stand in the middle of nowhere." so in order to do that we had to make a 90 degree right hand turn going 50 miles per hour into a parking lot on the side of an interstate. we nearly hit the guy trying to pull out of the ice cream place. the look on his face was "oh man, what a stupid way to die, that prick bitch, i can't beleive this, oh thank god i'm not hit." the tires wretched and screached at the ground and rubber burned and the death toll came very close to rising. everyone was eating their ice cream and wondering what the hell was wrong with those stupid kids with their unkempt clothing and hair. fuck this shit, long story short, we ended up doing what was deduced to be a 525-degree turn in the middle of a bend in the road about four minutes later, and people came running out to see if we were alive. not driving with homebitch ever again. that shit is dead. get the self control pill, and the heart thats actually a heart not a response to the idea of hearts pill. and maybe we can talk without making every statement largely demeaning. i'd be good at being your dad.

B POSI+IVE!




hey this is great- lets love me together. but here's a scenario: so suppose you and a few friends are going out for a night on the town. and your friends have a few different ideas, but you decided not to bother coming up with any ideas. and so you now have a few options from a few people about what few things there is to do. so then democracy sets in and the group says well lets figure out what it is we few want to make happen. they go around the room and say whatever few things they had thought / talked about. and then it comes to you. and you say "i don't care either way". well i just want to let you know something about people like that. if that person is you, you obviously harbour some sort of intense maternal-driven hatred for your "friends". on the other hand- if thats your good buddy, they must really dislike you, they didn't come up with even one idea, not even something like, lets just sit here. now listen... i don't say things like "i don't care either way", i'm a good friend (like angela levy). its so mean spirited to "don't care", and that ain't me. but if i had a few friends, and they said, "here are your options; what do you want to do". i would say "i care either way." because i love friends! don't you wish you had friends now too!?

WHAT'S LOUISIANA GOT TO DO WITH IT?


politicians always sound like they're trying to dump you. they must be fucking someone else.